May 11, 2022
Regina Weeks: This is Why – and How – We Care
By Sheryl Wilde
As Shared by Lydia Conde
Author’s Note:
When I heard the story of Regina Weeks, I was in awe. I must admit, it’s not that unusual for me to be awestruck by the residents and staff of Mountain Shadows. This is a place, after all, where I believe Earth Angels dwell and miracles happen daily. But there was something about Regina’s story that gave me chills. At first, I wasn’t certain why. Then I realized the answer wasn’t just in the why, it was also in the how. And the why and the how are both rooted in the same little four-letter word.
The Five-Week Transformation of Regina Weeks
Week One:
“When Regina came to Mountain Shadows Apple house,” says Lydia Conde, QIDP, “she was almost like a zombie. She was confused and didn’t really understand why she was here. She wouldn’t walk, though she could. She didn’t want to get out of the wheelchair she had come to us with, and she kept repeating, ‘I want to go to work. I want to go to work.’
“The first week was a little bit challenging. She was crying all the time and whining a lot. She was throwing some tantrums and getting upset over little things. She would stomp her feet and yell really loud.
“It was especially challenging at night, because she wasn’t sleeping. She didn’t sleep for the first week. At night, she was always scared. She kept saying, ‘I’m scared. I don’t want to be alone!’”
Mountain Shadows had been told Regina suffered from dementia and depression, and had significant behavioral problems. She had lived in a home for 40 years. When that home closed, she was shuffled around to various facilities – first to another home, then to a hospital, then to an acute rehabilitation facility. It was there that it was recommended Regina be placed on end-of-life care due to her dementia! Thankfully, that did not happen.
Finally, in November of 2021, Regina was transferred to a skilled nursing facility, where she lived until she came to Mountain Shadows.
“It was shocking to me,” says Lydia, “Regina had been living in a hospital room, sharing it with another patient, for months. She didn’t even have a bedroom. So, one of the first things we did was setup Regina’s bedroom in Apple house. We decorated it with pictures of her family, and put all of her things in the room – the doll her family gave her, her favorite stuffed toys – on her bed. We made it her room.
“We were also told Regina’s behavioral problems were caused by her thinking people were ignoring her when she wasn’t talked to. Since most of the Apple house residents are non-verbal, I was concerned her behavioral problems might escalate.”
Despite this somewhat shaky start in Week One, things quickly took a turn for the better for Regina.
Week Two:
“By Regina’s second week in Apple house, she started attending the United Cerebral Palsy (UCP) Day Program,” continues Lydia. “We learned Regina had worked at UCP before, and she used her wheelchair to get there! And that was why she refused to get out of her wheelchair and was constantly repeating, ‘I want to go to work’. She liked going to work, and now, she’s back in the routine of working again. That routine of going to UCP has really helped her.
“By the second week, she was also sleeping through the night. We reassured her that she wasn’t alone, that we were here for her – and that she had a roommate too!”
Week Three:
“By the third week, Regina was already bonding with the staff. She was taking initiative to help with chores in the house, and she was walking around Apple house freely – without her wheelchair! She wasn’t even asking for it anymore.
“When I went to Apple house that third week, Regina said, ‘Hi! I remember you! I miss you.’ That was a huge moment. Then the next day when I saw her, she said, ‘I really like Jackie.’ Jackie is one of the other residents in the house. I said, ‘Is Jackie your friend?’ And she said, ‘Yeah. I really like her.’ And I just thought – WOW! Jackie is non-verbal and Regina has already connected with her.”
Week Four:
“By her fourth week, Regina realized Apple house is her home – not just another place to stay for awhile and then be shuffled somewhere else again.”
Week Five:
“Regina has now been here for five weeks and she is not the same woman that moved in! She is happy, sleeping through the night, socializing with the staff and residents, talkative, and comfortable in her home.
“I recently worked the night shift at Apple house and when I arrived, I went in to check on Regina. She was awake and very happy to see me. I tucked her into bed, gave her one of her favorite stuffed animals, and said ‘Good night. Sweet dreams, Regina.’
And Regina said, ‘Good night. I love you.’
“It brought tears to my eyes when Regina said she loved me. And as I fought back a swell of emotions, I said to myself, ‘That right there is why I care.
“Regina’s family started crying when they heard Regina said she loved me. They had been praying for that. They said, ‘Regina doesn’t usually say that. So, if she says she loves you, she really means it.’
“We also recently confirmed what we already knew – that Regina doesn’t have, and never has had, dementia. As I said, they had recommended she be put on end-of-life care due to dementia!
“Regina has now been properly diagnosed with an intellectual disability – which of course we knew all along. Mountain Shadows knows how to identify and care for someone with an intellectual disability.”
Author’s Note:
As I mentioned earlier, I was in awe of Regina’s story – of how she had transformed so quickly. But something was bothering me. It all almost seemed too easy. I wanted to know more.
I asked Lydia:
“HOW did all of this happen so quickly? What techniques or methods were used to help Regina make this amazing transformation?
Lydia hesitated for a moment, seemingly at a loss as to how to answer. When she answered, her words were simple and yet profound. She said:
“Regina just needed someone to care.
“There really weren’t any special techniques or methods that we used. She just needed to know someone cared about her.
“Regina’s story is not uncommon for people with disabilities. What happened with Regina made me realize why places like Mountain Shadows are so vitally important. It shows that people with disabilities, no matter how mild or severe, just need love, and caring, just like the rest of us.
“It makes a world of difference to be treated like you are human, and that you matter, and that you’re just as important as anyone else.
“I see it as a gift – a huge gift – to love people that others don’t see as worth loving. I think the Mountain Shadows’ family has this gift.
“Mountain Shadows is more than a community. It’s a home. It’s a family. It’s a place where people with disabilities are accepted, loved and cared about. That’s something I think each and every one of us, deep down, longs for.
“Mountain Shadows truly lives by their motto of ‘Because I Care’”.
Regina just needed someone to care …
That’s the why and the how of it.
Mountain Shadows – helping Regina and all those we serve …
Because We Care.