Honoring a Mountain Shadows Hero on this Veteran’s Day By Sheryl Wilde As Brian looked down at the grave, he said what he says every year, “Love you, Papa. I miss you.” “Our dad was a B-17 bombardier in World War II, so he was in the nose of the plane,” says Dale Stafford, Brian’s brother. “He had his own set of machine guns and he’d try to protect the plane when they were flying missions. He was the one who pushed the button and said, ‘Bombs away!’ “It was on his 23rd mission, in December of 1944, that he got shot down. The crew was captured by the Germans. Dad was in a POW camp for six months.” |
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“Dad was the lead officer in the camp. Each day, every morning, the guards would bring him a pitcher of water and a loaf of pumpernickel bread. He wouldn’t see them again until the next morning when they would bring him one pitcher of water and one loaf of pumpernickel bread.
“Dad went to the commandant to complain. He said, “The Geneva Convention says you’re supposed to get at least two meals a day as a POW.” And the commandant said, “You’re supposed to break the loaf of bread in half.” One loaf of bread and one pitcher of water. That’s all they got.
“Dad was injured during the crash and he got gangrene. They had to amputate his leg. The German doctors – and by the way, none of the German doctors wanted to be in the war, they didn’t think it was right – they took care of my dad. Had he not been taken care of by the German doctors, he would have died in that POW camp, and I wouldn’t be talking to you today. My dad made a lot of sacrifices. “The Russians liberated my dad from the German POW camp. Dad would say, ‘The Russians, you wouldn’t think they were our friends, but they liberated me, and they took very good care of me.’ They got him back to the American troops.” | |
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“Dad married my mom when he came back to the States. They built the first Ford car with a shift on the handle, instead of a regular stick shift on the floor, for him, because he had only one leg and couldn’t use a floor shift. He was given the first car ever made with this new type of shift.” |
“Brian was born in 1951 with cerebral palsy. I remember my dad telling me a story. He said the State told him Brian wouldn’t live past four years. They said to put him into an institution. My dad went to visit the institution and he said, ‘There’s no way Brian is staying there.’ So dad took over Brian’s care. We, as a family took care of Brian, but my dad was his main caregiver, and he did everything with Brian.
“Brian has never been able to use his legs, so he’s always had a wheelchair of one sort or the other. My dad just made sure he was a part of every family thing that happened. “My dad was a great man. I’m glad he decided not to have Brian institutionalized.
“Brian moved into Mountain Shadows many years ago. They’ve done an absolutely wonderful, wonderful job taking care of him. He has so much freedom at Mountain Shadows, and he has the opportunity to do what he wants to do. He loves the day program. They take him to the mall. He makes friends with everybody. Everybody knows what coffee he wants and what he wants with his coffee at McDonald’s and Arby’s. “Our dad passed away in 1999. I had to drive down and sit with Brian and let him know dad was gone. He was so sad when dad passed away.
“Mountain Shadows, though, was really a lifesaver for Brian. I think, after dad passed away, if Brian hadn’t had the Mountain Shadows community, he might have died too. Everybody at Mountain Shadows was supportive of Brian at this time. They’re a good group. They took care of him emotionally. It takes very special people to take care of someone like that.” |
“Ever since dad passed, Brian has gone every single year, except the COVID years, to visit dad’s grave on his birthday. It’s a big day for Brian. It’s a very important and emotional day for him.
“At the cemetery, Brian cries. I hold him and pat him on the back. He says a prayer. I can’t understand it, but he says a prayer. Then he sits and looks at the grave for a while. Then he wants to come home. He’s done what he wanted to do. It’s his way of honoring dad. “Brian brings two bouquets of flowers and puts them on my dad and mom’s graves. We clean up the grave and headstone and make it look nice.
“I learned a lot about patriotism from my father. I learned to be thankful for what we have. And I learned to just be kind, to give the same kind of kindness to others as we give to Brian. Having Brian as a brother taught me, more than anything else, how to be kind, to be nice, to be respectful of other people.
“My dad was special. Brian is special. He’s an integral part of the family. I don’t remember Brian ever complaining about his condition. He just accepted it and that’s the way it was. He didn’t feel any different than anybody else, other than he couldn’t walk. And we encouraged him not to think anything other than he’s just like everybody else. Brian’s pretty damn special. The doctors said he wouldn’t live past four, and now he’s 73 years old. I think Mountain Shadows has played a part in that.”
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“I’m so proud of my dad for what he sacrificed, for the country, for Brian, for my family. “To the end of dad’s life, we always had a loaf of pumpernickel bread in the house. We always had a loaf of it in the house for him.”
Don King, Mountain Shadows Board Member, has made the journey to Riverside Memorial Cemetery with Brian several times. “It’s how Brian stays connected with his dad and mom. It’s something he can do. He can’t do much, but that he can do. And when you are surrounded by all of the headstones, and all of the folks buried there that served in the military, it’s a time to reflect on the sacrifices made in the pursuit of our freedom. It’s time to reflect on how blessed we are to be living in a country where you can say things other people don’t want to hear. It’s tough. Freedom is tough.”
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On this Veteran’s Day, we honor all the brave men and women who sacrificed so much for our freedom. And our Mountain Shadows family gives our deepest respect and gratitude to Brian’s dad, who displayed bravery in battle, courage as a POW, and who, just as importantly, displayed love, compassion and kindness, to his son, Brian, and his entire family. “Love you, Papa. I miss you.”
“A true soldier fights not because he hates what is in front of him, but because he loves what is behind him.” ~ Unknown |
The Mountain Shadows Foundation –
Because We CARE |
Thanks to YOUR SUPPORT, the Mountain Shadows CARE program provides recreational and social experiences to residents and participants, like Brian, adding meaning and richness to their lives.
It’s easy for you to help us continue to provide activities like this – activities that improve the quality of our residents’ lives in fulfillment of their dreams. Here are some ways you can help ensure these crucial activities can continue for years to come: - Make a one-time donation today by clicking on the donate button below.
- Make a monthly or annual contribution.
- Leave a Legacy Gift.
To learn more about the Mountain Shadows Foundation Legacy Society, to include us in your estate plan, or to let us know if you have already designated Mountain Shadows to receive a legacy gift, please contact Mandy Huiras, Director of Development at: mhuiras@mtnshadows.org, or visit our website by clicking here:
Learn More About the Mountain Shadows Foundation Legacy Society Please share this story with your family, friends and co-workers to help grow our Mountain Shadows Family! |
Mandy Huiras Mountain Shadows Foundation Director of Development
Contact Mandy today to learn more about the Mountain Shadows Foundation and how you can make a difference in the lives of our residents:
mhuiras@mtnshadows.org |
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